Everything about this article is perfect and quotable.

In one month, where do you see yourself? Riding a big old fat Clydesdale down Market Street with a bottle of Bud in one hand and a middle finger to the rest of Major League Baseball. Suck an egg New York. Get lost Boston. Munch on this cheesesteak, Philly. Albert Pujols is the greatest hitter in the history of the game and his destiny is not one World Series ring, it’s five.